How To Show A Little Skin
Alert! Going out tops are back. The best bras you won't mind seeing. And an update on "Sheer in Real Life".
Good morning! And welcome back to 5 Things where it was a balmy 97 degrees and 110% humidity last week. What better time to experiment with youth culture’s latest obsession: the very small clothes of my youth. Last summer I wrote a letter about wearing sheer in real life. As a real person, with a real body. And it connected with so many of you! I was struggling to accept this fashion status quo. Now a year has passed, and I’m not sure if it’s the exposure therapy, oppressive humidity or a midlife crisis, but never have I been more compelled to show a little skin.
In one of the friend text groups recently, another friend was saying the same. Sure, traditional ideas of sexiness have ebbed and flowed through the trend cycle countless times since we started our parallel careers 20 years ago, but never have we been so inclined to participate. WHY!?
Skin has been in the air for a few summers now. The youth’s embrace of Y2K era going out tops, low rise denim, maxi skirts and mini shoulder satchels has been fully realized. But I’m now seeing scores of women, squarely in my age demographic, taking part. There’s the second youth of Gaia Repossi, former Celine queen. Margherita Missoni, yes of those Missonis, a boy mom like me, recently launched a line of…clubwear? It’s great by the way! Just look at how many of the new arrivals are sold out on Annie’s Ibiza! There is the resurgence of Paris Hilton era brands like Blumarine and Diesel. And new brands like Christopher Esber and the Attico, picking up where the UsWeekly brands left off. Lucky us, we get a redo of high school!?
On a phone date with a friend I admitted to my going out top purchase: “I just ordered a purple silky Rabanne top with chain straps, WHO AM I!?” Another aging millennial told me everything she owns is sheer. That’s just her existence now. So today, a few ways to experiment with taking it off (some of it at least) while remaining squarely in our zone of confidence. In five concepts of course.
The Going Out Top Lives!
My t-shirt + skirt security blanket is boring me. Am I still wearing it most days? Yes. But am I pining for something MORE!? Also yes. This might be because tops have been so difficult to find for so long. Brands have been resting on their knitwear and button down laurels, but I’m finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel (in terms of actual options!) *Stay tuned next week for a whole deep dive into summer tops, you will not be disappointed!*
Of all these tops, it’s the GOING OUT TOP that is most shocking and fascinating right now. It feels wild how many wild tops you see just opening the internet (Enter any ecomm site here.) This was percolating long before Miu Miu showed tied scarves as tops on the spring runway (Prada is continuing the push with this glorified handkerchief just in time for summer!?) The much anticipated return of bouncy flouncy Chloe is filled with low cut ruffles and I’m not mad at it? PSA, this Victoria Beckham top on the Outnet is very Chloe vibes…you’re welcome! Wait, this too! I could go on.
What the going out top is doing for me specifically, is giving me the chance to show a little skin, without having to commit to a full dress’s worth of sheer or body hugging fabric. I can dip my toe, so to speak, by baring just my clavicle, simultaneously settling comfortably in my biggest drawstring pants or my weirdest skirt. I set my sights on this slinky Paco Rabanne number (which has received a standing ovation from my closet) for a few reasons: The chain strap feels fancy on my skin. The color is specifically not black - a color I feared would skew too sexy given the shape and excessive gold. While it shows a significant amount of collarbone, the draping and finishes feel comfortable, not too tight, not too revealing. And then of course I am keeping this top far away from my skin tight “dinner jeans”.
The Bras That Deserve to be Seen
There are bras that look great when they’re part of the outfit, and then there are bras that just look like…your bra is showing, ehh ehmmmmm. Everything must be considered when attempting this maneuver. And there are so many specifics to consider that we better just refer to the visual guide below. So a few examples if you will:
The Colorful Bra
The pop of color bra can be fun if not trying to show too much of it off. Like a little bit of lace showing through a slub white t-shirt. Or a little crescent of color sticking out of the sleeve of a grey muscle tee. Picking a lace that can be shown off comes down to coverage: you want quite a bit! And sheen: you want the least amount possible! I have found the Araks Tamara bralette to meet these requirements well. The sides and bust coverage is full enough that the lace doesn’t seem trashy. And the lace quality is top notch, so there is no sheen making it look synthetic, even though, obviously there there is some stretch thrown in there.
The Bodysuit
I recently went to a sample sale with literally one item in mind, never a good idea (probably never a good idea to go to sample sales, but that’s a story for another time.) I did not see the dress I had been pining for since 2021 on the rack so I asked them if they had one somewhere? And they literally went into a back office and found the sample for me and let me buy it. Could you die!? I was so happy. Anyway, I have a point! When I tried it on, it was a little too sheer for my comfort level, and a little too tight for me to layer a slip underneath, but there was no way I was leaving there without the dress (paging Celine Dion!)
When I got home, I tried it on with a black bodysuit instead of my usual Spanx boyshorts and black Fruit of the Loom bandeau bra and low and behold, the look was very cool!! The dress is not actually sheer. I’ve tried the whole bodysuit under lace dress thing and still felt incredibly naked! This dress, and so many others are just slightly too transparent to pair with standard underthings. I also just ordered the J.Crew x MNZ pink slip dress which I plan to do the same thing with. It’s not here yet but I’m pretty confident it is going to be too sheer to wear without a similar style of undergarment. I’ll report back.
The black creates an interesting, “whats going on there?” effect without making me feel too bare down there. With white, I think it might like I just didn’t realize my dress was see through. With the black, it’s all of a sudden A LOOK!
And then there is the bodysuit as top. I’m still working on my confidence with this one. I just booked a pilates mat class as I write this to ensure those shoulders stay BACK! But when it’s this oppressively hot out, it can look so incredibly sexy without actually having to do much. I love the idea of a bodysuit with a fluid skirt that can balance the top with some coverage a la the photo below.
Dark under Light
In the same vein as the colorful bra under a white t-shirt, sometimes a hint of black under something that feels squarely breezy can also feel incredibly sexy without showing off…anything really! I’ve been wearing my favorite Else bra (you all already have her from this newsletter) under this white peter pan collared shirt and a Dosa dress that is basically a glorified nightgown. And The Kye Ikebana under sheerish tops like this vintage sweet Prada tank below. The funny thing is about wearing black under these lighter, sheer tops is that they camouflage the transparency in a way that white sheer on white sheer would not. Like, the Kye Ikebana is very see through. But you’d never know it under the floral Bode top below. Kind of a fun little scandalous secret to think about as you walk down the street, no one the wiser.
And as far as sheer in real life goes, I am pretty sure I’m never going to get as far as wearing something like this sans slip. But that’s ok. I’m enjoying the challenge of finding ways to experiment with different fabrics and lengths and necklines other than crews. :) So see you out there, in your spaghetti straps! Signing off and putting on my bodysuit and jorts to tackle the day.
Yours TRULY,
Becky
Ok I love the idea of this…but with big boobs everything starts to feel wayyy more porno (in general lol, let alone with sheer/exposure). Would love to hear from some busty ladies if you’ve figured out a way to participate in this trend without feeling completely inappropriate? And has anyone with DD+ worn Kye bras? I love the look!
I know some people in the fashion world make fun of the "Going Out Top," but I'm feeling the need! When going out or dinner, I do want to wear something a little different/special. I went out for dinner last night and couldn't tell you what shoes the others were wearing. All that mattered was the top, with honourable mentions to the bottom. I have very, very little to wear out for dinner in the summer months.